Parent Mental Health Day: Child-Focused Alternatives to Court for Separating Parents
In anticipation of Parent Mental Health Day on 30 January 2026, Rebecca Coates, Partner in the Family Law team reviews the different options parents now have in reaching decisions about their children.
It is widely acknowledged that separating is one of the most, if the not the most, stressful event in a person’s life. The purpose of Parent Mental Health Day is to raise awareness of the vital link between parent and child mental health, reducing stigma and providing practical support. It is therefore important to prioritise and your mental health throughout the separating process and choose a route that works for you and your family.
Below are some alternatives to Court proceedings for resolving issues such as child arrangements or division of the finances. Court proceedings are often lengthy and expensive, which can put pressure on the family and impact the parties’ mental health. Court proceedings should always be a last resort.
1. Collaborative law
Collaboratively trained lawyers are family lawyers with extra expertise in working together with other lawyers to reach a mutually satisfactory outcome. The matter would be conducted over a series of round-table meetings (called four-ways). The lawyers would prepare Agendas in advance of the meeting an ensure that your points are heard in the meetings. The difference between collaborative law and a round-table meeting hosted by solicitors is that in the collaborative route, all parties- parents and lawyers- sign a Participation Agreement committing themselves to work together respectfully and in good faith to find solutions with an emphasis on focusing on the family’s future.
Rebecca Coates is a collaboratively trained lawyer in the Family Team and can assist you and your family down this route.
2. Mediation
Mediation differs from collaborative law. It involves the parties agreeing to use a Mediator who will be impartial and who will work to ensure that each party feels heard in the sessions. Mediation is often quicker, less expensive and less acrimonious than Court proceedings. Often alongside the process, the parties consult lawyers or involve a family therapist. In some cases, children can be included in Mediation (child-led Mediation), but not all Mediators offer this.
3. Arbitration
Arbitration is a process whereby an independent arbitrator is appointed by both parties, who then makes a decision that will be binding. There are now Arbitrators that specialise in Children matters. This means that the matter will be determined by an expert in this field and the parties have control over the process, such as the identity of the arbitrator, the venue and whether to meet face to face or not. This process is also far quicker than Court proceedings. Removing any form of delay is usually in the best interest of the children and their parents.
Whatever route you opt for, always be mindful of your mental health and ensure that you have a good support network.
On Parent Mental Health Day, we encourage parents to seek early, supportive advice. Our Family Law team can guide you through child-focused alternatives to court that prioritise wellbeing and reduce conflict. Contact our Family Law team on 0330 822 3451 for confidential advice.